This is my Chic Critique Glimpses 52 post for the week.

We moved into our home not too long ago.  It’s wonderful.  Amazing views out the front AND the back.  Perfect kitchen.  Big living areas.  Fabulous neighbors (and I’m picky because my last neighborhood was filled with my best friends.)  We, honestly, couldn’t be happier about it.  We joke that the only way we’re leaving is in body bags (in other words we aren’t ever moving again… EVER.)

The only thing that needs work is our back yard.  It’s… how should I put it… UG-O!  We moved in late enough in the year that the plants and trees wouldn’t have survived the winter (still strange to me that we live somewhere with an actual winter) so the HOA told us we would do it once things warmed up a bit.  Sadly, that is just now happening.

So, the kids have decided that this is now their massive sand box.  Something that is really different from Arizona is that there’s no sand.  At the park in AZ the kids would shed their shoes before they even got to the playground.  They loved the feel of sand in their toes.  But here?  No.  It’s that mulch stuff.  The first time we went to the park here (before we moved up here, actually) the kids shed their shoes, took two steps onto the mulch, and yelled in shock and disgust.  ”Mom!  What IS that?!?”  :)  They are use to it now but our sand toys are gathering dust.  Works out perfectly.  Hopefully in a few weeks the yard will be done and the kids will have to settle for playing on the dirt lots next door.  I’ll be sure to post pictures once the yard is done.  We are hoping it will be as perfect for us as the interior.

His teacher’s name is Miss Natalie and she’s great with Carter and the other little boy in the class.  We practice during the week and after a few months of lessons and practicing he was ready to test for his yellow belt.

Practicing for the test.

He did great and got his yellow belt.  Addilyn has also decided that karate would be much more fun than dance and has opted to quit dance and start karate next month once she turns 5.  I’m excited for her.  Here’s hoping that she’ll get good enough to fight all those boys off in a few ( like 25) years!

The most rewarding thing for me is to see him getting stronger.  He’s still MUCH weaker than the other kid in his class (who is a year younger than him) but most of his weakness is in his legs, and karate is a lot of leg work.  So, any improvement is great.  He’s doing so amazing, and, as always, we are so stinking proud of him!

The proud owner of a new yellow belt. (Pink cheeks are yet another side affect of the chemo.)

This is my Glimpses 52 Project picture for Chic Critique this week.

Didn’t your mom (or someone who knew what they were talking about) ever tell you to NEVER give up?  Well, recently while on Chic Critique Forum, (this is my Glimpses 52 image for the week) someone was talking about their Expodisc.  It put a little bur under my saddle so I’m trying to get the hang of it again.  Potentially, it could save me tons of time!  IF (fat “if”) I get use to it and use it all the time my white balance would always be spot on and I wouldn’t have to change it in Photoshop.

So, here’s my experimenting tonight:

This picture is just having my white balance on Auto (AWB).  If you look at the things that are suppose to be white, it’s clear to see that the color is completely off.  (For example, the word “Shield” is white in real life.)

Side note:  We are NOT giving Carter the drug “meth”.  He takes a medication called Methotrexate… but occasionally, joking around, we say he’s a meth head.  :)

Without the Expodisk

At that point I tried to use the Expodisc.  I had the exposure correct for the meds (or whatever the subject may be), held the Expodisc up against the lens of my camera, and took a picture.  It was mostly black.  I went into my camera settings, changed the white balance to “Custom” and set the custom white balance on that picture that I had just taken that was mostly black.  Then I snapped another picture of the meds.  This is what I got.

Not what I was hoping for.

Ummm… a swing and a miss.  Wow.  I would say this picture’s just a LITTLE green.  :)  Next attempt was to put the Expodisc back on and take another picture (leaving the exposure the same) of the light source.  In this case, that was the Tungsten pendent lights above the meds.  This is what my picture WITH the Expodisc looked like.

My new Custom White Balance picture.

This is SUPER green.  I’m sure it’s because I had just totally screwed up my custom white balance a second before.  I then set this picture above as my new Custom White Balance setting, and tried once again to take a picture of the meds.  This is what I got.

After CORRECTLY using the Expodisk.

It’s perfect!  This image is straight off the camera.  Nothing has been done to it.  I feel like I can handle the Expodisc indoors… now to conquer handling it in back lit shade lighting…  :)

Next, about the pictures.  Carter is on tons of meds.  (Duh.)  Monday nights are his big night.  He has 2-3 different kinds of medications depending on the Monday night we are dealing with.  He has at least 8 pills (upwards of 10 on occasion).  If he’s awake he takes them fine.  If he’s sleeping?  Well, that’s a different story.  He is SOOOOOOOO  (SO!) hard to wake up.  It takes us several minutes to wake him up.  Often times it involves removing any and all covers, turning on his light, using loud voices, splashing him with water, sitting him up… you name it, we’ve tried it.  Once we have him sitting we reach for the meds and turn around to find him snuggled up again on his pillow.  So, next time we hold his arm while reaching for the meds and water.  He will take a sip of water and lay back down, assuming he has taken his pills.  We finally recorded it (because he absolutely does NOT believe us in the morning when we tell him how silly he was being) so he could see himself.  He laughed the entire way through it.

He’s seriously such a trooper… especially after weeks like this past one.  It was one of the hardest we have had and it’s not letting up a whole lot.  He’s finally making it through an entire day of school today (an hour and a half to go!).  Something he hasn’t done for over a week.  Poor guy.  Two years and one month to go… but who’s counting.

This love note is special.  It’s written on the back of a note pad.  You know when you use all the paper and there’s just that piece of  cardboard on the back of it that you just chuck?  Except this one isn’t garbage.  Carter wrote us this note and set it on our bathroom counter about a week before he was diagnosed.  As bad as it is to admit, I wasn’t planning on keeping it.  I hadn’t gotten around to throwing it away when we were faced with our son maybe not living a full, long, healthy life.  At that moment, that little piece of garbage became one of my most prized possessions.  It’s been on my mirror since then and every day it makes me smile and thank our Lord for letting us fight this fight.  

Side note: the note above that is a VERY sweet card from my bestest friend.  She’s amazing and has had a rough go the past few months.  I heart her and I’ll keep her note forever and ever along with Carter’s.

Chic Critique Forum Glimpses 52 picture for the week.

Noelle and Ryan

This is also my Glimpses 52 picture of this week for Chic Critique.  While I normally do a snapshot from my daily life, this one is special.  Noelle is part of my life, and now, so is her sweetie.  We can’t wait to get to know him!!!  He’s seriously one lucky guy.  Noelle is A.MA.ZING.  LOTS more pictures to come!

And what a year it has been!!!  I would like to say that the biggest thing we have learned over the course of the last 365 day (or is is 366 days since it’s leap year?) are facts about Leukemia.  Don’t get me wrong; I’ve learned more about Leukemia than I EVER thought I would know.  But we have also learned so so SO much more.

~We have learned how to lean on each other.

~We have learned to rely on God and exercise our faith.

~We have learned that it’s ok to be served (this was a hard one for me… I think all us mommies want to be Super-Moms).

~We’ve learned that we can drive to the hospital with our eyes closed (don’t worry… we don’t do it… just sayin’ we could if we wanted to).

~We have learned how to unaccess his port at home.

~We have learned how to give him chemotheropy through his port on more than one occasion.

~We have been to the ER 4 times…. or is it 5?  We have taken advantage of having a radiologist as a neighbor in order to get discharged from the hospital faster.  (Don’t look at me like that!  You would too if you were a frequent flier over there.  And he doesn’t mind!)  *** Tangent Coming*** The most recent time into the ER is right now.  Carter woke up with  fever of 104 so off we went.  (It was Bryan’s turn.  I took the girls to church.)  Don’t worry, they are on their way home right now. They think it was just a random virus that in a normal person would have passed without even being noticed.

~Carter has been poked (this is a guess on the low end) at LEAST 75 times between the port, arm, and finger.  (Usually arm or port.)  (Bryan thinks it’s closer to 100.)

~We have learned that we are loved by so many people.  We have people follow his story that don’t know him or us all that well.  We are prayed for by people everywhere.  Nothing warms my heart like hearing my friends tell me that their little ones pray for Carter.  So sweet!

~We have learned that PRAYERS ARE HEARD!  They are answered.  We have a very loving Father in Heaven that is healing our son.  I am not taking credit away from science.  For the first time in my life I actually APPRECIATE science. (I stand corrected to my 16 year old self who hated science more than words.)  But, at the end of the day, God decides.  The ball is in HIS court.  If he wants our baby to live, he will (and he WILL!).  If it’s his time to go home (it’s NOT!) then that’s what is going to happen at the end of all this.

We have grown closer to close friends, gained an entire new circle of friends at the Pediatric Oncology Clinic, and cried more than one time to our moms.  (Ok, I’ve done the crying… to both moms… )  We have grown to love Dr. Cook and Dr. Reaves so very much for the interest that have taken in this journey we are taking as a family and the unconditional love they have shown Carter… and the patience they have shown me.  Our family is closer than it was a year ago.  Our marriage is stronger than it was a year ago (and it was already pretty awesome, all thanks to Bryan).  We hug our babies tighter.  We tease Carter about how we are going to poke his port.  We tease Addilyn about how we should shave her head like  Carter’s (was) so they look more alike.  We have planned our super awesome Make-A-Wish trip (first week of this December!!!).  We have witnessed the merciful hand of God.  We think it’s funny that our two year old knows that “Cawter at chemo.”  We are the proud owners of a DS (SWORE I’d never let my kids have one) that Carter can only play at chemo.

In short (who am I kidding?  This post is anything but short) it has been quite a year.  And we have survived it!  That in itself is something to be proud of.  We are use to our new life.  We enjoy our time together.  We have adjusted and are loving our lives.  We thank our Father in Heaven daily for the health that we have and for how well Carter is handling this.  We are thankful that THIS is our trial and not something else.  There are so many things that could have happened that I don’t think I could have survived.  (Although I don’t think I would have said we could have survived this.)

We love our life!  We love our battle and we love our Savior, Father in Heaven, and guardian angels (oh yes, they DO exist!!) for helping us face this day after day.  Carter is the toughest little guy around. He tougher than any football player in the world in my book!

Side Note:  I had big plans to take some pictures of Carter today playing Legos and being a “normal” little boy… but plans changed.  So, we have pictures of him passed out on my bed because as he declared to Bryan on the way home from the hospital, “Dad, I’m gunna find the first soft thing I come to when I get inside and take a nap!”

He didn't even wait for me to cut off his hospital bracelet.

Look at those eye lashes. He never lost all of them... most of them, and then they grew in blond at first but they are back to their long, thick selves.

If he wasn't approaching 7 and my husband wasn't a dentist ("Don't spread germs!") I would kiss those cute lips right off his face!

This is my Glimpses 52 Project for this week for Chic Critique Forum.

Waiting for her brother to get home from school.

I love this one in black and white...

And I love this one in color...

"Are you done yet, Mommy?"

This is my Chic Critique Forum post for this week’s Glimpses 52 Project.  LOVE that place.  Have you seen their new magazine?  It’s SO awesome!!!

But now she’s out of the crib and in her big girl bed (or “gi-gil bed”).  So, away with the diapers (oh happy day!).  But, like a lot of things with parenting, it was a double edge sword.  She’s up at the PRE-crack of dawn daily coming in and announcing “Goo Marnin’!” at the top of her little red-headed lungs.  Annoying?  Perhaps.  Cute?  Most definitely.

So, short story made long, we are really trying to push the whole “you can do this all by yourself” thing in reference to going to the bathroom, taking off her little undies, and putting them back on.  It’s a LOOOONG process for her and often times her legs end up in the same hole or everything is backwards and in-side-out.  But, if this allows us to sleep until 7 then it sounds like a pretty fool-proof plan to me!  She’s so darn cute and while it is truly the end of the diaper era at our place, I was doing the happy jig when I passed all the diapers along to a dear friend who still needs them around.  (Did I snicker when I did this? Perhaps. Was I absolutely over the moon about it?  Most definitely.)

Success!

Glimpses 52 Project for the week for the Chic Critique Forum.

**Note: this is long. Deal with it. My blog. My miracle. I can be long-winded if I want. **

You always hear about those amazing miracles that happen to people. You read about them. People share experiences in church. But this week was OUR turn. We’ve had a rough year. Usually, it’s fine. But let’s be honest. No one wants their little boy to be diagnosed with cancer. And when that horrific thing DOES happen, you think “Surely the dear Lord wouldn’t give us any more trials. Surely THIS is all we can handle and still actually function.”

Well, this week our world turned up-side-down all over again.  A few weeks ago I was chatting with Carter’s oncologist, Dr. Reaves, about his very uncooperative liver.  She suggested we test him for Hepatitis C.  She followed this suggestion with, “I’m SURE he doesn’t have it. But let’s just cross it off the list.”  I agreed, giving it no more than a fleeting thought.

Fast forward a week, she called me to let me know about his current liver counts and then told me his Hep C test came back in the “Gray Zone”.  That means that is wasn’t negative…. wasn’t necessarily positive, but it wasn’t negative.  She said we would retest him when he came back in in a few days, reassuring me that it was merely a mistake.  After all, he doesn’t shoot up (we keep the drug use to chemo drugs ), he’s not having sex (that we are aware of ), I was pretty darn sure I don’t have it so he couldn’t have been born with it, and the chances of him getting it from a blood transfusion are anywhere between 1 in 2 million to 1 in 10 million.  So, surely it was a mistake. 

Fast forward again to Monday night, February 13th.  We were dropping Valentine’s off to my kid’s best friends (Chelsea and her kids).  They wanted to play for a minute so we went in.  While we were there (I’m so glad I was with her and not alone since Bryan was working), Dr. Reaves called me with some VERY unexpected news. “His Hepatitis C test came back positive. I am so sorry.”  We asked if there could be ANY mistake?  Could it be a false positive?  No.  He had (basically) 2 positive tests.  One non-negative and one positive. There was no mistake. Then it got even worse.  Dr. Reaves continued, “If he DID get this from a transfusion, we need to be safe and test him for HIV.”  Raise your hand if your 6 year old has been tested for HIV… no one?  So we’re alone on that one?

We know the angels around us went to bat for us.  We know they pleaded our case to our Father in Heaven.  I know one of those angels was my grandpa.  I had an out loud conversation through my tear-stained eyes on Tuesday morning begging him to go ask Heavenly Father face to face to heal my little boy; to not make him suffer more than he already has.  I know he did that.  I know he, along with Bryan’s grandfathers went and talked some sense into God. (Although, I’m sure the sense was already there… )

This is from tonight... fresh off his monthly steroids... hence the cheeks.